Cyberbullying – how to identify it and steps to deal with it as a parent

Published on Wed Oct 13 2021 in Family

Many of today’s parents grew up with bullying being a common occurrence in the playground, on school buses or the walk home - a problem which still occurs to this day. For most of us, home was a refuge where schoolyard bullies were not present.

Today’s children, however, not only have to deal with this face to face, and once they get home, they can still be the target of bullies. With online social networks, children can be exposed to harassment and bullying 24 hours a day. 

Thankfully for our children’s sake, bullying is less tolerated these days. Policies are in place within schools, and laws have been passed to deal with online or cyberbullying. However, even after the passing of the Harmful Digital Communications Act in 2015, research from Netsafe, an independent online safety organization, shows that 1 in 5 young people are still being bullied online each year in NZ1.

What is Cyberbullying?

Netsafe defines online or cyber bullying as using any digital technology to “send, post or publish content with the intention to harm another person or a group”2. However, unlike traditional bullying, it does not have to be shown to be repetitive due to the lifespan content has once published or uploaded to the internet. 

Online bullying can take many forms according to Netsafe3 including, but not limited to:

  • Name calling online
  • Repeated unwanted online messages
  • Spreading rumours or lies
  • Fake accounts used to harass people
  • Excluding people from social activities
  • Embarrassing pictures, videos, websites, or fake profiles

How to identify bullying

As parents it is important to be able to identify when our child is being bullied. Signs that your child may be being bullied include physical symptoms of anxiety such as unexplained stomach aches, nightmares, social withdrawal and reluctance to go to school. They may talk less about a previous friend or group of friends and seem more isolated4. Some children may not show any visible signs, which makes it especially important to have open communication with them, and teach them what bullying is, so they can identify it for themselves.

Steps to take as a parent

If you find your child has been victim of cyber-bullying, Netsafe suggests the following steps to help:

  • Speak with your child and make sure that they are ok
  • Explain that it is not their fault, and they have done nothing wrong
  • Don’t try to “get back” at the bully – this could make things worse
  • Help them take screenshots or keep URLs of the bullying
  • Report it to the platform that it’s on (e.g. the social media or gaming platform)
  • Contact Netsafe for advice about what else to do
  • Help them with after-care to help rebuild their self-esteem

The Harmful Communications Act 2015

The Harmful Communications Act provides redress for people who have been victims of cyberbullying causing ‘Serious emotional distress’5. The court can issue orders to the perpetrator to force them to remove the harmful content and if appropriate issue an apology. If the courts orders are not followed, or if the court determines an offence has occurred under the Act, they may issue penalties of fines and/or prison sentences6. To report infringements that have already occurred, you can use the 105 non-emergency number or online 105.police.govt.nz

 

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About Author: Momentum Life is a leading provider of Life insurance and Funeral insurance in New Zealand.

 

i. Online Safety Parent Toolkit - Netsafe – Providing free online safety advice in New Zealand
ii. Online bullying advice for parents - Netsafe: online safety for New Zealand
iii. Online bullying advice for parents - Netsafe: online safety for New Zealand
iv. Bullying | KidsHealth NZ
v. Harmful Digital Communications Act 2015 No 63 (as at 01 December 2020), Public Act 4 Interpretation – New Zealand Legislation
vi. What is the Harmful Digital Communications Act and how are offenders penalised? | Newshub
 


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